Facilitating Connection
Honest Expression
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59m
Jim & Jori Manske, Certified NVC Trainer: Expressing ourselves honestly is sometimes scary because we can't predict where the conversation will go after we've made ourselves vulnerable.
This recording will demonstrate how the power of our honesty is enhanced by ending on a clear and present request. Doing so supports self-connection because we know what we want before we open our mouth, and also supports connection with the other person because it gives them the gift of knowing how they can contribute back to us.Personal practices for facilitating connection:
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Consider what need(s) might be addressed for you by using connecting requests and when you might use them.
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While in conversation, consider what you or others want back after they speak. Would a connecting request be helpful? How might you express that?
Practices for facilitating connection within a group:
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Decide together how much time each person will speak about what is alive in them about connecting requests, while others listen. When listening, do so silently and notice what you are connecting to, for example: present observation, feeling, need, request; past observation, feeling, need, request; or opinions past or current; something else. Speak only when you can reflect briefly (six or less words), for example: "so (need) is important?" or "you want (need)?"
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When everyone is heard, have a conversation using the pattern of listening, reflecting and speaking, using the two connection requests to guide the conversation.
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